THE AMERICAN MUSIC AWARDS: THE REVIEW

In all I thought there were too many unnecessary performances last night. If you are not nominated your ass shouldn't be performing.
PERFORMANCES THAT STOOD OUT (GOOD BAD OR INDIFFERENT)


Janet danced a lot. I'm missing something from her. I realize its incredible to do all that in your 40s and she hasn't lost a step. Also she looked beautiful doing it, I was just missing something from that performance. And the fake eyelashes didn't help.

Shakira was entertaining. Unfortunately for her Beyonce has swagga jacked her whole swag so now I'm kind of sick of it. She tried to spice it up with the whole stepping thing I guess, but there was no wow factor about this either

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• Kelly Clarkson has completely lost her zest as of late. Don't get me wrong, the bish can hit a note but she is totally letting herself go. I always say if singing was the only appeal you needed to be a superstar worthy of my eyes watching on national tv, 99% of what we will see is unattractive sloppiness...and 60% will bore us to death.

Jay z and Alicia Keys did their thing. I didn't get that same feel as I did when they performed it for the first time at the MTV awards but they got through it.

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• Black Eyed Peas did okay. Fergie was Fergie, and for me the main attraction. Sure she was pitchy at times but bare in mind she doesn't use that echo thing that most of these chicks use nowadays. In all, they were entertaining.

Rihanna proved once again why she has trumped Beyonce as the most overrated woman in show business. However Bey does have some musical talent.  Rihanna is the epitome of mediocrity, and I can no longer stand by and watch. She sounds like a billygoat, she has the swagga and rhythm of a corpse, and she has no stage precense whatsoever.  And the bish was lipping 90% of the horrible vocals. That beatdown can only give you press for so long.... Jay Z's dizzle and your stylist can only do so much. Step ya fukin game up ya wack bish.

Lady Gaga shitted all over that stage and that wasn't even her best performance. However because of the subpar efforts of the majority before her she came off looking like the only professional.

Mary J Blidge was boring as hell and completely unnecessary in this line up

Jennifer Lopez came out swinging and overall she shitted, coming second only to Gaga. The 40 year old had swag, she can dance not just coochie pop, and she wasn't even wearing panties.....Then she jumped...landing on her inflated arse....and bounced up like it was a beach ball onto her feet...Complete professional. Bish still shitted, fall and all.

Whitney Houston's performance was emotional but her vocals are a far cry from her hay day. It makes me mad actually but it's Whitney. We're just glad she's off the pipe.

Alicia Keys "Try Sleeping With A Married Man Broken Heart" was an attempt to prove she could dance. I was just talking about the fact that her behind the keys routine was getting boring and then she did this. I will now have to ask her to go back to sitting behind the piano for 99% of her performance as usual. That tribute to Ciara's "Promise" was not the biz. I love the song though. And her vocals were on point. But when you don't got it, you don't got it on the dance swag sexy tip.

Eminem joined by 50 was actually good. It wasn't until the last year or so that I finally go the hype about him.

That fool from American Idol thinks he's the male Lady Gaga. That was the lamest attempt at getting attention I've every seen in an award show.

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• Carrie Underwood was everything Rihanna was suppose to be. Still the best country singer performer in the game.

NOTABLES DURING THE NIGHT

• We mentioned Jlo's fall, that was epic. And then she had to go into a solo after...that was crazy
• Jay Z's 'men lie women lie #s don't' line was funny and I suppose a shot at 50. 50 deserves it cause he's seriously has been out of pocket with respect to Jay Z for a minute now and on the heels of rumors that his album sales are horrible Jay Z went for it. However 50's 4 albums still outsells Jay Z's 10 albums so I don't know how far Jay wants to take that. Not to mention, Eminem outsold him this musical year yet he's getting awards. So I say "payola (aka pay offs) are the only thing that doesn't lie."
• Did yall see Jay Z stiff arm to trophy lady that tried to kiss him on the cheeck? I guess groupies get no love. That was wierd. Anyway he did kiss Toni Braxton so atleast we know he wasn't in a foul mood.
• I was on twitter while watching to show and saw that as soon as Jay Z finished his speech, Chris Brown twitted "cornball." When someone called him out he said he was talking about somebody who was freestyling in his house. Uhm, LMFAO. Poor kid started backtracking worse than rihanna's hairline. Don't be scared of speaking the truth. We all know the only reason Jay Z is relevant is because of Beyonce.
• And the twitter folk were up in arms about Taylor Swift beating out MJ for an award and going apeshiz/kanye on the chick. I say she outsold all of your and my favorite this year and last. Don't be mad at her. THE NUMBERS DON'T LIE.
• And 0 awards for Lady Gaga, thanks to the dream crusher Taylor Swift.